He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
