This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
