Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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