Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
