Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
In other news, I just burned my penis
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
