he wants to bone in the snuggie
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
