Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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