i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
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