I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
