so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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