You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize
