I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
