I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
