it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
