he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
