It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
