When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
