its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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