So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Randomize