So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
