I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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