As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
