K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i would punch a child for taco bell
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize