if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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