the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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