I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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