I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
