Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
