They should really pass out barf bags in church
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Randomize