did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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