just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
He felt like a one man threesome
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
