so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
COCAINE IS GR8
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
