It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Are we still banned from the library?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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