C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
