I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Randomize
