You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
