And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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