I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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