I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize