and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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