wat bout pragnant strippers??
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
