it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
