just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
