I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
im having a threesome with these popsicles
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
