he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
