If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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