ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
