Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize