We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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