your parents love me but you hate me
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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