he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
