Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
